It has been a very long time since I have written.

I would like to say that I have a good excuse. I am sure I have alot of excuses. But the truth of the matter is that my real life has had some very real things going on that has made me really not want to write.

The Thursday before Thanksgiving.. my friend Scott went missing. He has been a very good friend that I met through blogging. I have known Scotty since 2005. I knew him under his blogstream name Randy. He wrote a wonderful blog called Life After The Hollow . While many of you know me as Shibari... When I started blogging I was Vegas... and I wrote about my epically failing marriage . Randy was an awesome support system for me. So when he was missing .. I was frantic. I had just heard from him three weeks prior and he had texted me "Hey Shib - I am a little sick right now- I will text you when I am better"  I didn't think much of it. Scott and I emailed- texted and talked on the phone .. when we could.

So we started a social media campaign on twitter and facebook - I was posting his missing poster everywhere I could - Just hoping that my dear friend would be found safe and sound.

So Thursday When the news came out that the police department in Auburn Alabama had found his body. I was beside myself with grief. I was completely broken by the news. I began to cry and really have cried in the days since. In a sense, I felt as though I lost a family member.  It cuts very deep.

So to my Scott- Thank you for helping me find laughter in the midst of my tears...  For being that sounding board that was willing to hear what I had to say .. with no judgements. Who got my duality- who shared thoughts of God and love and ideals. Who sang french fried taters to me to send me into peels of giggles. Who loved with his whole heart.. who was a brilliant photographer.. father and friend.  There is a jagged piece missing from my heart with you not in this world.  I will be forever grateful for your friendship.. forever thankful that God put you smack dab in the middle of my world. I will see you again friend.. But for now I am glad you found peace from your demons... I love you !